(and maybe, just maybe, save some mice along the way) 🪱

Tiny pond-dwelling flatworms called planaria might just be the future of brain science. Forget high-tech AI for a second — these slippery little noodle-creatures may help us treat mental illness.

Yep, science says worms get “stoned” too. 🧠💊

A new study from the University of Reading found that worms react to brain medicines just like rodents do. Meaning? They might replace mice and rats in research labs.

👉 Ethical upgrade: fewer rodents harmed.
👉 Funny (or is it?) downgrade: worms don’t exactly make great lab mascots.

🎭 Worms vs Rats: Who Wore It Better?

• Rats and mice: Cute, furry, sneezy. Some even make good pets. 🐭

• Worms: Slimy, bendy, wriggly. Kinda look like spaghetti that forgot how to be pasta. 🍝

Still, worms get high on haloperidol (a mental health drug) in the same way rodents do. They slow down, they chill out, they vibe. Basically, they microdose against chaos.

And if that means fewer rodents in cages, science says: score one for the worm squad.

🧪 Experiments Already in the Worm Pipeline

• Epilepsy treatments — Worms have been tested for seizure-related drugs.

• Addiction research — They’ve shown withdrawal symptoms when taken off substances. (Even worms get the shakes… yikes.)

• Mental health meds — The latest breakthrough: worms mellow out like mice on antipsychotics.

At Reading, undergrads now watch worms get stoned in pharmacology class. Imagine that lecture: “Alright students, today’s lab involves… worms on drugs. Don’t try this at home.”

🤔 Big Questions Nobody Asked (But Now You’re Thinking)

1. If worms feel drugs, do they feel feelings? 🥹

2. Are we just repeating the same mistake — moving cruelty down the species ladder?

3. Could ants, spiders, or cockroaches be next in line? (Wouldn’t surprise us if someone already tried it.)

4. Does the fact worms love drugs prove humans never had a chance resisting them? (Cocaine isn’t just for Wall Street, apparently.)

5. When we die, it’s not rats, it’s worms that’ll dine on us anyway. Call it karmic recycling.

The Odds of Dying a Particular Death Are Odd—And Guessing Them Even Odder

💸 Worms: The Budget-Friendly Lab Rats

• Rats need space, toys, snacks, vet bills, and sometimes… cocaine. Expensive lifestyle.

• Worms? Just a dish, some dirt, and drugs. Bargain-bin biology.

• Bonus: No one complains about worms’ living conditions.

In this economy, worms might be the ultimate inflation-proof pet AND research subject. 🪱💵

🌍 Bigger Picture

This quirky research could help develop new treatments for schizophrenia, hallucinations, and other mental health disorders without leaning on traditional animal testing.

And if you want to nerd out more seriously:

• The University of Reading news release dives into how haloperidol makes worms chill.

• And the BBC explains the push for alternative research models on animal testing: Could AI put an end to it? After all, no-one enjoys subjecting animals to the practice.

⚠️ The Final Worm

So, should we save rats or worms? 🤷
Honestly, neither signed up for this gig.

But science marches on — and until we grow brains in Petri dishes (we’re working on it, right?), someone’s gotta trip for the cause.

Meanwhile, let’s raise a toast (not a worm)?
Here’s to the wiggly stoners who might, however reluctantly, unlock better meds for humans. 🍷🪱

⚠️ Disclaimer:

No rat, worm, or bug was harmed in the writing of this article. Research at your own risk—preferably with gloves and maybe a vet or a therapist.

If your worm is currently stoned, please do not let it operate heavy machinery.

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